Mr. Bear and Mr. Rabbit didn’t like each other very much and one day, whilst they were walking through the woods they came across a golden frog. The frog turned to them and said: “Ooh, I don’t often meet anyone in these parts.” They were amazed that the frog had talked to them.
The golden frog admitted: “Mind you, when I do meet someone I always give them six wishes. You can have three wishes each in this case.
Mr. Bear immediately wished that all the other bears in the forest were females. The frog granted his wish.
Mr. Rabbit, after thinking for a while, wished for a crash helmet. One appeared immediately, and he placed it on his head.
Mr. Bear was amazed at Mr. Rabbit’s wish, but carried on with his second wish. He wished that all the bears in the neighboring forests were females as well, and the frog granted his wish.
Mr. Rabbit then wished for a motorcycle. It appeared before him, and he climbed on board and started revving the engine.
Mr. Bear could not believe it and complained that Mr. Rabbit had wasted two wishes that he could have had for himself. Shaking his head, Mr. Bear made his final wish, that all the other bears in the world were females as well, leaving him as the only male bear in the world.
The frog replied that it had been done, and they both turned to Mr. Rabbit for his last wish.
Mr. Rabbit revved the engine, thought for a second, then said: “I wish that Mr. Bear was gay!” and rode off as fast as he could!
There was a mouse and an elephant and they decided to go for a walk in the jungle together. So they set off walking and talking and were not really paying attention to where they were going, when all of a sudden the elephant fell in a hole.
“Oh My!” the elephant cried. “What will we do?…I can’t climb out on my own”.
“Don’t worry” said the mouse. I’ll just run back into town and get my Porsche and we will have you out of there in no time at all.”
So the mouse ran back to town and got her porsche.
When she arrived back at the hole she backed the porsche up to the edge. The mouse then threw the elephant one end of a chain and secured the other end to her bumper.
“Here we go” the mouse yelled to the elephant as she put the Porsche in gear and pulled the elephant out of the hole.
“Thank you, thank you so much my friend!” said the elephant.
“My pleasure” said the mouse “Should we continue on our walk?”
The elephant agreed, but as he turned toward the mouse his trunk accidentally knocked her into the hole.
“Oh my goodness” the elephant wailed, “I’m so so sorry!…Oh, What are we going to do now. I’m too big to fit in your porsche!”
“Not a problem” the mouse responded “Just throw your dick down here” The elephant trusted the mouse so he threw his dick into the hole and the mouse climbed out on it.
Once she was out the elephant and mouse continued on their walk with no further mishaps.
And the moral of the story is… ?
“If you have a big enough dick you don’t need a Porsche!” Three dogs are in the waiting room of a vets office. The first dog asked the second dog “What are you here for?”
“I crap and pee all over the house so I’m going to be put to sleep. What are you here for?” the second dog asked.
“Whenever my master is gone, I tear the house apart. I bite
and chew on everything. I’m going to be put to sleep, too” replied the first dog.
The first two dogs look to the third dog and ask “What are you here for?”
“Well, one day my mistress was bent over vacuuming the floor and I just couldn’t help myself and I humped her.” said the third dog.
“They’re going to put you to sleep for that!?” exclaimed the first two dogs.
“No! I’m just here to get my nails clipped.”
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“Mr. Rabbit revved the engine, thought for a second, then said: “I wish that Mr. Bear was gay!” and rode off as fast as he could!”
Lol I could see myself doing that XD
I love them all especiallly the first and second one!!
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